What Coaching A–Z Taught Me About Language, Listening, and the Stories Clients Carry

“Unless we language hope with our words, we may soon languish.”

A coaching colleague recommended Coaching A–Z by Haesun Moon to me. She said, “It’s a small book. But it’s packed.”

She was right.

It’s the kind of book you can read in a single sitting — but you’ll want to read it again slowly, pen in hand, heart wide open.

Rooted in solution-focused coaching, Coaching A–Z distills decades of wisdom into simple, sharp, generous insights.
But more than anything, it’s a book about language.

And as coaches, language is our medium.
Our art form.
Our responsibility.

Why this book stayed with me

One of my favorite questions to ask clients is:
“What story are you telling yourself?”

Because so often, that’s where the work begins.

Coaching A–Z reminded me that coaching isn’t about advice. It’s not about fixing or solving or getting to the “right” outcome.
It’s about presence.
Curiosity.
And trust in the client’s own wisdom.

Every time I think I know what a client needs to do, I’m always wrong.
And I’m always pleasantly surprised at what they already know about themselves—something far wiser than anything I might have offered.

Haesun Moon puts it beautifully:

“When you uphold the other as the expert of doing their life, you can get curious about their way of being and doing — their logic in the world.”

That quote alone could change how we coach.

What it revealed about coaching

1. Language as a Tool for Hope
Moon introduces the Listening Compass — a tool that orients conversations toward the Preferred Future and Resourceful Past, rather than lingering in present problems.
It’s a reminder: our words shape the direction of the dialogue.
And clients often rise to meet the future we dare to name.

Coaching isn’t just about “active listening.”
It’s about intentional listening.
Hopeful listening.
Language that lifts, rather than loops.

2. Reflecting With Their Words, Not Ours
Early in my coaching journey, I resisted using clients’ exact words — it felt like parroting. I wanted to “translate” their ideas into more refined language.

But Moon’s insight reframed that for me:

When we rephrase, we insert our beliefs.
When we reflect, we honor theirs.

There’s something profoundly powerful in holding up a verbal mirror — not as correction, but as confirmation.

3. Behind Every Vent Is a Value
One of the most generous reframes in the book: complaints aren’t just frustrations.
They’re signals.
Often, they’re passionate appeals for positive change — values that want to be seen, named, and honored.

I’ve seen this again and again in coaching sessions. A client vents about their boss, a colleague, a decision… and under the surface?
A yearning for integrity.
For recognition.
For purpose.

When we listen for the value behind the vent, we’re not just offering empathy.
We’re offering direction.

4. Coaching as Curating Stories of Possibility
This line from Moon struck me deeply:

“Coaching is curating stories of purpose, possibilities, and progress.”

And isn’t that exactly what we do?

We don’t write the story.
We don’t edit it, or dictate it, or decide how it ends.

But we do help clients become aware of the story they’re in — and imagine new ones they may not have believed were possible before.

Final thought

Coaching A–Z reminded me that the most transformative conversations are often the simplest.

They begin with listening.
They move with trust.
They end with a client remembering who they’ve always been.

This book is more than a resource — it’s a return.
To humility.
To partnership.
To the quiet, radical belief that people already carry the wisdom they need.

Our job is to witness it.
And maybe, to language hope — just enough to help them see it too.

If you’ve read the book, I’d love to hear what stayed with you.
And if you haven’t yet, maybe this fall is the perfect time.